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Archive for December, 2007

frustration

gaah.. there’s so many things i want to do.. so many options i want to explore… but i’m stuck with all the work left before my review..

damn.. i have all these ideas, but they’re all stuck because i can’t even think about them.

damn studies!

back to trying to concentrate…..

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Hong Kong

It took me a year (360 days to be exact) but i’ve finally uploaded some of the photos of Hong Kong… heheh. Most of the photos were took by Nicholas and some were by me, with Sok Eng’s camera because i didn’t have one of my own at that time. From the gigantic pool of photos i took some and edited them.. i should say now that i edited them over the year according to my moods and some of them just look weird. I never planned to upload them in their original state though, i want everyone to see them from my perspective, my representation of the places in HK… All the effects were done intentionally, including some blurred ones… see if you can get the double entendres! To see the album, click the picture or click the ones on the sidebar. Oh.. it shoud also be said that the pictures only depicted a small part of the trip.. haha.. i just got tired of editing, there were so many pics.

Anyway, this album has none of us inside. The next one is the ones with all of us… (let’s hope it doesn’t take me another 360 days to get them up)

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New Years

Memories are funny; they are like the tiny bits and pieces of junk that accumulate in your room, slowly and silently. And one day you turn around and tell yourself i’m gonna clean up my room and you take a look at all the weird odds and ends and you start to think: where did all this junk come from? Pull the bin towards you and start sifting through the rubbish; but suddenly each piece of junk seems worthy, and each object seems priceless beyond measure…

Tristyn says 3am is “stay away from alex and his dumb philosophical questions” time, and it’s partly true – 3am is a crack, a fissure in the smoothness of time’s passage; a break in the monotony of daily life when i get bored of doing whatever is it that i was doing and all these weird ideas come from somewhere in the back of my mind and overwhelm the focus of the day. I have been on (official and self-proclaimed) holiday the past week, and without any focus of my energies on any specific purpose all the aforementioned ideas pop out and bounce everywhere; and i feel heady at all the funny things coursing through my head and all the strange questions my brain poses to no one in particular. No, they are not deep, philosophical, crazy-insight-filled observations; just weird questions nobody thinks of.

The casual restraint of these questions in my mind are almost the instinctual by-product of concentrating on something, like classes or assignments, almost like slag. It’s been a slag-free week, and i’m trying to continue my studio project before time runs out, but i’m having trouble packing all the funny notions up and putting them away at the back of my head. It’s so irritating.

For the first time in my life, i did not see the new year coming. It’s so corny to say things like “omg the year passed in a blink of an eye i SOOO did not see the new year approaching” and that has never happened to me; year-end school/college holidays in Malaysia (typically a month) always marks the coming of the new year so clearly and so distinctly that i’m thinking of the new year long before it actually comes. To me, the start of all new years had always been an apparent marker of change, a sort of genesis-type feeling that i can’t explain very well, and has always featured prominently in my life, even back when i was a wee little boy and did not know why ( i still don’t) Yet this September was already a beginning, and that was enough. Apparently, the new year had already begun…

Of course, the damn indifferent Glasgow did not help. There is totally NO indication that the new year is upon us, NONE at all with the exception of some puny lights in George Square and a few bright things hanging over some streets. Pah. Semester ending dates (end of january) also do not help.

In case you were dumb or (highly unlikely) reading from a RSS feed or something, i’ve have changed the theme for this blog because there are complaints of tiny words :p I hope this is better. And, notice the new flickr thingy at the sidebar? I’ve swore to actually put pictures online :p Now, the next step is to get an actual flickr account…………so bear with the default stock images for awhile =p

I also wanted to add a little about recent days here because i am too lazy to write a separate post in the next couple days, but apparently i found out i was also lazy to continue writing, so what happened in the end is that i wrote this tiny little paragraph to act as a conclusion. Chronic laziness is so pathetic, i know………………

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Merry Christmas

and a happy new year..

been busy.. so have not have had time to update.. hopefully tomorrow

i know it’s already over but in the meantime, joyeux noël et bonnes vacances!

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tvb visions

The thing that really grinds my gears in TVB dramas is how they can fly to the Philippines or to Beijing or whatever every other day and treat it as if taking the bus downtown to pick up some groceries. And how whenever secrets are exchanged in whispers in some secluded back alley some guy is always hiding behind a street corner 10 or 15 meters away and hears each whisper clearly as if standing right next to the whisperer.

There you have it, two random gripes about TVB dramas. I know many people have told me not to watch listen to dramas while cadding/sketchup-ing/photoshopping (the only 3 things i’m doing these days) so that my productivity will supposedly soar, but as i’ve said, it lowers efficiency (true) but increases productivity over time because now i can work really long hours, like 10pm to 10am (and 12 episodes) until i make the fatal mistake of swiveling my chair around and “accidentally” fall on to my bed and poof all daylight is gone when i next open my eyes. More importantly, being semi-distracted keeps the heebies-jeebies away. Without the comforting sounds of people crying, shouting, whining, whispering in alleys and generally enacting predictable plot sequences in predictable settings my brain goes wild and keeps on going back to the now seemingly melodramatic studio stress of the last semester.

To think about it now, and to look back on to my posts of that time, it does seem so affected, exaggerated like a stage performance. (on an unrelated note, to answer someone, this is half the reason of why i blog.. a good opportunity to look back and be critical about it) And when i relate those days to people who were not there, not physically connected to me during that period, they sometimes indulge me in humorous disbelief and i often wonder was it me who had been overblown in my sense of perception being in the middle of it all, or merely there are some things that you have to go through it yourself. Because duh, i was never exaggerating… (didn’t need to :p)

I promised to streamline my work and efforts to transit as smooth as possible from each crit to crit to final review to final presentation this time, and things were going well until the Sungai Buloh project (which is now complete, inasmuch as i can make it so) messed up my schedules. The handling of this project, however, is to my intense regret and it was a very important lesson learnt, at the expense of certain people that i’ve no right to demand such an expense from. My apologies to these people.. How many times do i have to learn that life is not a college deadline (extensions and extensions and then rescheduled), and that there’s only one chance? Many of these lessons, it seemed, couldn’t be bought with overcharged tuition fees. As the chinese proverb goes, i just can’t drink the wine that is offered, only the one that is forced on to me. Yes, i paraphrased it. No, don’t correct me. Call me overly serious or overly sensitive or overly fudgy-dudgy or utterly confusing, but i’m only starting to learn how important is it to have a certain pride in whatever you call your work… and how important, how essential is it to have a vision….. (which, i have to say, can be as simple as a million dollars, don’t misunderstand..)

What’s yours?

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I just wrote a post card entirely in french. That and wrote a letter inviting a friend to my house (with directions)

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

hope i can pass!

I hope to write a proper update in the next few days…..

time to crash on my bed zzzzzzzz

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Soap opera

Whoever said architecture students are lifeless and uninteresting robots (partly true) has not been to the department at this university. There’s an ongoing saga involving the entire year 3 students, feuds between certain members of the department, bickering, complaints and “strikes” here and there, and a whole lot of ensuing chaos. It’s almost like living a soap opera, or like the TVB serials i’m currently watching listening to while i do my work. This is one of the perks of having a wide screen monitor :p

Updates: am busy…

will be busy until the end of the semester.. at least i’ve learnt to pace myself better.. (i hope)

am working towards a panic-free semester!!!

more soon.

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